It's the quiet ones you've got to watch, and the shy ones you've got to gently press

I posted an article about shyness in the workplace on Facebook from the New York Post (link here) and a few days later I got into a nice conversation from an old classmate of mine.

This classmate (female, if you want to know) said "I totally agree with you...I still blush once in awhile, but I'm beginning to become better at speaking up being more forward."

I think in all of my 37 years in existence, that message was like a tiny drop of water hitting a calm pool and reverberating throughout the pond. That simple message of "I know where you're coming from, I'm in the same boat" was nice, refreshing, honest, and direct.

For many years, I've held myself back, all because I thought the next words to come out of my mouth would either be a rooster's crow or something I would regret. I never went to dances, semi-formals, proms, or anything remotely resembling social gatherings because I was too shy to ask a girl out. Asking questions at my job takes a little bit of courage, but I always seem to preface it with a joke to take the edge off of that anxiety. Once the question's asked, though, I feel much better.

To "shore up" the shortcomings I have with the Cleary Squared tongue, I take solace in writing. I don't know if it's because the delete or backspace key is within easy reach, or I think better through a 110 key piece of machinery (I'm on my fifth keyboard in five years), but there's a certain satisfaction of clicking your way to a conversation, rather than coming up to someone face-to-face and going, "a-duh, homina, homina, homina" and actually insulting the one you intended to ask out for a coffee or a night out.

There are probably people who seem really bold, forward, almost obnoxious, who are actually as shy or reticent in person. The quiet kids who don't speak all that much actually tend to be funny and smart, but don't want to reveal all the cards they have in their deck until they know the proper time to use them. Sometimes people mistake the quiet people who don't say much for shy people who are too afraid to say anything.