Dear Patrick Swayze...

I watched your interview with Barbara Walters on YouTube.

I am the son of a lung cancer patient who died in 2005. When he was diagnosed in 2004, the cancer was discovered as osteosarcoma hit his femur and the bone snapped. The next day, tests confirmed that osteosarcoma came from a mass in his lung. We all got to watch cancer transform him the same way it's transforming you - weight loss, chemo, etc. You still don't look too bad, but those last few weeks he was alive, he was down at least 25-30 pounds. Not once, though, did he want pity, sorrow, or anything else. He still cracked jokes and did what he could to keep his quality of life until he drew his last breath on November 22, 2005. When my father finally passed away, however, I didn't scream or cry. I felt so relieved and happy that he didn't have to suffer through the monster that was cancer anymore.

When I watched that interview, however, not a single time did I say, "Poor guy, he's doesn't have that much time left." I said, "Wow, Patrick Swayze could kick cancer's ass and do a scene from Dirty Dancing at the same time!" (Or at least give it a temporary kick in the naughty bits.)
Certainly, it's going to be sad to leave your wonderful wife of 33 years, Lisa Niemi. It's still sad for my mother, as those past memories will rush up like a wave and crash at the least expected time. What's left over is not the body, not the voice that you hear when you wake up in the morning, but the memories and the love. That's the most wonderful gift you can leave before and after you die.

The late Bill Bixby once said, "People with cancer just die, give up...you can't do that." That's precisely what you're doing - keeping everything up just to maintain your sanity. We all die - that's a fact. When is the variable that makes us nervous - some die moments after they come out, others last for a century or more. Only God (or your favorite deity) knows for sure. When that moment comes, it will not be a sad moment. It will be a joyous one.

I wish you the best of luck during these times, and keep on with that uptempo attitude of yours!

Cleary Squared